Archive for the ‘Personal’ category

Settling down

February 3rd, 2012

Needless to say, or maybe I do need to say since I haven’t really said too much about it (except a little here), the past week or so has been stressful.  Not that simply living in a foreign country/culture isn’t stress enough ;) but what with getting the kids into secondary school, shopping for them all, wondering if funds would cover it (thank you to those who helped…shopping and fees are covered!) it made for long days.  Not to mention the bumpy, dusty roads getting the kids to school!  It’s one of those things though where I knew it would come to an end eventually and that helped, knowing it wasn’t a continual thing.  We still have 2 more girls to get into school  and then all our new secondary students will be in school….yeah God!

I had mentioned in another blog post that I was looking forward to the end of the busyness so things could settle down.  A friend actually laughed (ok, she put lol in her email!) and thought that was a funny way to end.  I never really thought about it until she mentioned it….my sense of normality has certainly changed and the “stress” of not knowing if electricity will stay on, or when it will turn off, whether or not water will flow or even just plans for the day are really not stressers any longer.  I’m not saying I jump up and down for joy when the electricity goes off, I only do that when it comes back on!  We simply turn on the flash light and wait.

God continues to teach me more and more how to rely on Him, making Him my confidant, allowing His Spirit to guide and in the same manner chipping away those things which get in the way of His purpose for me, allowing our relationship to be even stronger.  As the saying goes, I’m a work in process!

 

 

A bit calmer today

January 17th, 2012

Actually I’m a lot calmer today compared to yesterday, thanks to prayer (not only my heart cries, but friends lifting me up) .  Today I haven’t heard anything from the student and I’m hoping that means he is back at school and staying!

It didn’t hurt either that I had three packages come in the mail so I got to end my day on a high note opening care packages which included pepperoni, Crystal Light drink mix, movies, beef jerky, Starbucks coffee and a few other items.  Thank you friends and family for sending the items!

I know life gives us all ups and downs and will continue to be that way until our final breath this side of Heaven.  My own personal issue is how to deal with those downs in a Christ-like manner and how to continue leaning on God during the ups.

“Two things I ask of you, LORD;
do not refuse me before I die:
Keep falsehood and lies far from me;
give me neither poverty nor riches,
but give me only my daily bread.
Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you
and say, ‘Who is the LORD?’
Or I may become poor and steal,
and so dishonor the name of my God.  Proverbs 30:7-9 (NIV)

 

What’s in a day?

January 13th, 2012

I’m trying to write a blog post every day…doesn’t always happen but I’m trying!  Seems some days just don’t seem worth the ink on paper (or bytes on computer?).  Not saying anything depressing, simply it’s life as usual and do you really want to hear about my day?  Today you don’t get a choice, here it is!

This week I’ve been at C4KK most days, thankfully there is electricity there so I can work on the computer throughout the day and coordinate with Ann on various items and see the kitchen being stocked and many other every day things, which I really like.  But today I am staying home for a couple of reasons.

One, it’s pizza day and pizza ingredients need to be prepared, which doesn’t take me all day but I hate the thought of coming home around 6pm and THEN starting the prep work and finally eating around 9pm…don’t like it.  This reminds me too, I am out of ham, on my last portion of mozzarella cheese and have 2 more cans of mushrooms which means a trip to Nairobi is in order to get these items :(

Two, I need to do some cleaning.  I’m not in the mood to do a full mop of the floors so perhaps a simple sweeping, cleaning the bathrooms and that’s it.  Update:  cleaned the bathrooms but didn’t sweep….spiders get a reprieve for a few days.

Three, I felt like vegging out today.  My mind went to mush this morning as I did my nails and watched something about 25 best/worst plastic surgeries in Hollywood!

Now as I write this post the electricity has gone out.  We’ve been pretty lucky lately in that it seems to stay off only a very short time, so far it’s been 20 minutes and my battery on my computer is quickly dwindling.  Update:  electricity came back on approximately an hour later and I decided to bake some brownies a friend sent :)

Boring, right?  Well, it’s life for me today here in Kenya…I am, however, thankful for the beautiful sun shinning in my window, the cool breeze coming in, the fact my pizza prep doesn’t involve electricity (hopefully it will be on so we can actually cook the pizza!), the time I had this morning with the Lord, the encouragement of His word and for this day, boring or not!

Oh what to write

December 29th, 2011

Seems I have much to say but nothing I really want to try and express….right now.  Frustrations abound.  Nothing really out of the ordinary but just things that make me scratch my head and think “what is going on here?”  Simple requests turn into ordeals (is there enough food to last three days?  Yup.  But then getting a call the next night – there’s no food)  Things like that tend to frustrate me.

The culture, food (or lack thereof), friendships (or lack thereof) seem to be frustrating me a lot lately.  It seems much of this stemmed from the Christmas celebration we had at C4KK.  It was wonderful seeing the kids have a good time and I think satan hated that.  So when he doesn’t like something it normally seems more tests are brought about from it.

So I just take one day at a time.  Attempt to give it to God.  Allow the Spirit to guide me.  Wait for His peace.  Walk towards Him.  Pray I pass the test, today and tomorrow.

Home again, home again

December 21st, 2011

Had to put in a small reference to the book I recently finished reading….The Book.  Very interesting book in my opinion :)

Anyway, we are heading home today from Nairobi. It’s been a fun few days of living the city life compared to village life.  We stayed up late working on computers and phones because of the incredibly fast internet (still not as fast as you all have in US, but comparably fast for us in the village).  I was able to catch a movie in an actual movie theatre!  We saw Sherlock Holmes and I thoroughly enjoyed the stop action and slo-mo of the film (ok Robert Downey Jr. wasn’t so bad either!).  There aren’t many theaters here in Kenya (approximately 10 in the entire country) so I was lucky to find a theater which actually had a movie I wanted to see – many films are from India and not exactly my type of movie.  I got to eat a salad and it was delicious!  No lettuce in the village so it’s been about 6 months since my last salad :(

The mall we walked around at had Christmas lights up and a cool breeze was blowing at night so it kind of reminded us of Christmas back in Phoenix.  Oh and we actually heard Christmas music playing in the stores!  It really almost brought tears to my eyes…darn that Frosty the Snowman!

That’s why you haven’t heard from me the past few days.  We were actually going to stay until tomorrow but decided to head home to prepare for the big Christmas dinner with the kids at C4KK.  I have a feeling this will be like  no other Christmas for them and I would like to thank God here and now for the providence to allow this to happen.

In case I don’t get back on the blog for a few days….have a very blessed Christmas celebrating God’s gift to us.

What’s your idol?

November 11th, 2011

Idols come in all shapes, forms and sizes…it could be a person or a object.  Whatever it is that takes my focus away from God and becomes an “all important” item is an idol.  I’ve had many idols throughout my life.  When I was younger it was the idol of being accepted and loved which led to some bad choices.  After I accepted Christ I KNEW He was there to forgive my bad choices and help me learn to make better ones.  But that didn’t mean I set aside my idols forever.

I notice an idol can begin as a very small thing but grow into a full blown “golden calf” (reference to Exodus 32).  I admit, my car was one of those things growing into a golden calf.  I loved my car (first mistake, nothing is really mine).  Washing it by hand (no car washes in order to keep it scratch free) and driving it anywhere, anytime.  I didn’t want anyone driving it or parking too close.  It was important to me.

I knew deep down it was just an object, but oh what an object it was to me!  Then God called us to the mission field…Kenya.  I had to make a very hard decision to let go of this very near and dear to my heart item.  This meant getting rid of the  hold it had on me and letting God take hold of me instead.  Trusting that God would fill whatever void I felt only this car could fill.

Admittedly I still think about my car once in a while, but it’s funny, I think of the freedom I had driving not necessarily the car itself.  My perspective has changed quite a bit since living here in Kenya and I know God has filled that void but continually inspecting my life for what is or may become an idol in my life is an ongoing search of my heart.  It may not be an object but perhaps serving Him.  Do I forget it’s God who moves my heart not the needs of the people around me?  I have to remember I’m here (in Kenya) out of love and obedience to HIM…no one or nothing else.


Their silver and gold
will not be able to deliver them
in the day of the LORD’s wrath.
It will not satisfy their hunger
or fill their stomachs,
for it has caused them to stumble into sin.  Ezekiel 7:19b

Praying my idol continues to be my Lord and Savior and when I fall I thank Him for His forgiveness and love so freely given.

To be or not to be….

November 9th, 2011

a complainer, that is.  Today I really felt like complaining but every time a complaint entered my mind a contradicting image pushed the complaint aside.  For instance….I wanted to complain about not having running hot water to wash dishes or clothes (I won’t even get into the complaint of having to wash every article of clothing by hand) but as soon as I thought of that I remembered our neighbor who has NO running water at all…hot or cold.  So trust me, I know there are people in worse places than I am in and dealing with so much more than my petty complaints.  But there are days when I just want to complain.

As the day progressed I can honestly say Jesus’ peace overcame my complaints (ok some may have taken a few more minutes than others) and I had a heart full of thankfulness for being so abundantly blessed to have what He has given me.  I also wonder though how much my lifestyle needs to change in order for my complete and full attention to be on God and His will for my life instead of the insignificant complaints that enter my head.

Smiles

November 7th, 2011

A look into the weekend.

Saturday at C4KK:

Since not much was happening at C4KK I decided to color with the kids.

 

Preparing to show off our artwork

 

Lots of proud smiles. 3 of these kids are from a nearby children's home...Ann said they are happier here and I'm not surprised since we actually give the kids food.

 

Sunday we visited Bosco and his family for afternoon tea:

Steven gets to finish the milk from the tea

 

David gets some milk too but he only peaks around the corner

 

Coletta puts together a puzzle we brought. It was fun watching her think and figure out where the pieces went. And boy was she proud when she completed it!

 

Streak (Bella's son) waits for his milk from the tea

 

Bosco's family (and friends!)

 

After coming home I had to take a photo of Chuck and I for a friend (why on Earth he would want a photo of us I don’t know!) but thought I’d share it with you too

It was nice to see all the smiles this weekend.

Anger

November 2nd, 2011

Woke up this morning angry.  Here’s the deal:

The curtain lady (Susan) brought the individual pieces for us to look at (brackets, pole, etc.) and negotiate the price.  We had a small disagreement on the price but worked it out.  That was on Monday, today I woke up and realized the brackets she showed us would have to be removed from the wall in order to remove the curtains for washing…and that can’t happen because once we take the bracket off the wall it can’t be put in the same position.  I was sooo upset with myself for not thinking about that at the time and (this is where I tried to place the blame on someone else) I thought “I told Susan what we wanted, she’s the ‘professional’ and should have thought through the details to make sure we got what we wanted.”

I tried every which way to place the blame elsewhere, but it always fell back on me.  Which made me even more upset and kicking myself for not thinking this through.  Not really sure why I’m even telling you all this either, to get it off my chest I guess.  We’re working through it (Chuck is at C4KK today and will discuss it with Ann).  I know it will work out but getting over the anger at myself is another matter altogether.  I feel bad too for creating this situation and now Chuck has to deal with it, like he doesn’t already have enough to deal with.

Yea, I know there is nothing to be done about the past but to learn from it and move forward….Lord help me to do that.

UPDATE:  Chuck called and Ann found out how to remove the curtains without removing the bracket from the wall…thanks God for working out that minor detail.  Guess I can move along to the next situation that will certainly come up and learn how to handle my anger!

 

 

Saturday today

October 25th, 2011

Yes I know it isn’t really Saturday but I had taken a few photos with my phone and wanted to share those with my blog readers (all, what? one or two of you!?)

my painting skills are a bit off....missed a handle

These guys are killing me with their “American culture clothing”….they got me missing musicals and Dominoes Pizza!

On the way home we saw a beautiful, full rainbow.

There you have it…my Saturday at C4KK.  I won’t even get into the fact we got home to no electricity – but thankfully the Lord saw fit to have it turn on just a few minutes after we arrived home so I could take a nice shower.  That was a nice ending to the day, thank you Lord!