My devotional for today was perfect timing…isn’t God always right on time?! Here is a portion of what I read and then I will explain how it was perfect timing:
I implore you to not give in to despair. It is a dangerous temptation, because our Adversary has refined it to the point that it is quite subtle. Hopelessness constricts and withers the heart, rendering it unable to sense God’s blessings and grace. It also causes you to exaggerate the adversities of life and makes your burdens seem too heavy for you to bear.
Sunday Chuck and I traveled to Nairobi to visit Kate and Johnny Brooks (you can see what they are doing here). They have been in Kenya for approximately 5 years so Kate understands the ups and downs I have been feeling and I loved the opportunity to just sit and chat with her (holding baby Éowyn was just icing on the cake!) Anyway…I felt connected in a way I haven’t felt since arriving in Kenya. No one here (except Chuck) understands my references to Seinfeld episodes and I haven’t met anyone here in Tala who has left their home country, kids, friends and family to live in a completely different culture so they can not understand the craziness I’ve been feeling. Although I love my sister Pauline and she is attempting to understand me (and my different culture) as I attempt to understand her (and her different culture) at this point the cultural distance keep us from a full understanding of each other. However, it has been a joy learning from her and I know through God’s grace our relationship will continue to grow and become closer.
With all that being said I was beginning to feel a bit of despair, like I was all alone in a world that doesn’t understand me. And as I write that a verse comes to mind – “If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world.” I understand my life is not to be comfortable for myself but to be obedient to what the Lord has called me to and that is being in Kenya. But I also know God loves me and knows how I feel and knows talking with Kate would help ease the despair that was slowly creeping into my heart. I know, I know God is always with me but He did create us to be social beings, right?
I must remember to “sense God’s blessings and grace” every moment of every day – our brother and sister in Christ, Gideon and Pauline, a roof over our head and food to eat. The food and roof are blessings I took for granted many times while living in the States but am finding myself trusting God each day for their providence. Also to remember with Jesus His burden is light so not to “exaggerate the adversities of [my] life”. God is seeing me through each and every “mini-breakdown” and in the process teaching me over and over to lean on His strength during the times my burden seems too heavy to bear.